This Floating Poo Was Way Too Meaningful! These Are the TV Disappointments of the Past Year.

As we reflect on the TV offerings of the past year, a selection of shows stand out not for their excellence, but for their spectacular shortcomings. From awkward spin-offs to confusingly bad docuseries, here are the productions that left us scratching our heads or simply reaching for the remote.

And Just Like That

Where to begin with this love/hate follow-up? Plagued with dreadful scripts, painful character development (we demand better for Miranda!), and a paltry 71 seconds of fan-favourite Samantha, the series fought to find its footing. Briefly, as the final season began, it seemed as if it had finally hit its stride. Then arrived an episode all about Seema’s natural deodorant. Little surprise the creator declared this would be the final series. It ended on a bum note; the lingering shot of Miranda’s toilet flooded with poo was simply too symbolic. Still, fans undeniably had a hoot picking apart every single “what on earth?” episode. And as Carrie – once again single – danced around her palatial townhouse to Barry White, who didn’t release a little sob?

All’s Fair

‘Can Kim Kardashian act? Of course she can’t.’

But that was practically the smallest of this drama's problems. The recipient of a very rare zero star assessment, it was hard to know where to begin enumerating the flaws. The hilariously leaden writing? The tedious veneration of affluence and materialism? The seemingly wilful procession of cliches? Acting so bad they felt almost spiteful? Suffice it to say “each and every one” and forget about this show again. However, a new season has been ordered, so we’re likely going to have to.

The Charlie Sheen Documentary

Considering the legal troubles, abuse allegations and parental failures, it’s reasonable to say Charlie Sheen has been a bad boy. Not you’d really have known it from this multi-part docuseries which chuckled along at Sheen’s various bouts of self-destructive hedonism while struggling to tell us a single thing we didn’t already know. Instead, it felt as if this loose cannon was being indulged, so any sympathy this series might induce should be saved for the people who have had to endure proximity with this charming but flippant narcissist.

The Supercomputer Drama

Of course we knew it was preposterous from the get-go: a thriller about a AI known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either solve global crises – or annihilate all of humanity. We persevered out of pure admiration for its leads … but by the end, it felt like even they had given up trying. One scarcely reacted when his character died, and the other ultimately slicing Charlie with an axe … in painfully slow-motion. Talk about admitting defeat.

MobLand

Dodgy characters convening in empty boxing gyms? The Prodigy’s Firestarter jackhammering away in club scenes? The late 90s called and demands its crime drama back.

Actually, that is unfair on the crime shows of the late 90s. Many look a little old-fashioned now, but at least they didn’t endure the ignominy of having to accommodate unconvincing dialects. But there were plenty of other problems. Mainly that it was just profoundly boring; a dispute over drug-selling territory between various London rogues which seemed rather simplistic.

With Love, Meghan

Given the extent to which she provokes the ire of the nation’s performatively enraged commentators, it’s almost easy to admire the Duchess of Sussex’s various forays into twee homemaking as intentional provocations. But then you watch them and are forced to admit that in this case, they may have a point. It’s like watching a homeware catalogue come to life; a meme for wine o’clock with ideas of grandeur; a parade of snoozing dogs, humming beehives, sentimental sayings and forgettable crafting “tips” you’ll not remember instantly. All underpinned by immense, mostly unearned wealth. Ugh.

The Beckham Documentary

There are clearly fascinating things to be discussed about both Victoria Beckham and her journey with vocation, identity, self-acceptance. But for whatever reason, this three-part series opted not to explore them. Instead, the viewing was like consuming a sales brochure. She clearly has every right to resent what she describes as her “miserable cow” image. But sadly, she failed to do herself any helps with this guarded non-event of a series.

The Game Show

It should have been the next cultural phenomenon – except even camper, with a famous star playing dead and a well-known personality managing her inheritance. What more could you ask for? As players competed, there was plenty of backstabbing and squabbling. But the rules quickly became bewildering: it’s still too complicated to explain what exactly was happening. Even more regrettably, we only saw brief appearances of the star via filmed videos. The show ended up smelling of a programme that was trying way too hard to live up to something far greater than it.

Too Much

How does one succeed a show that captured a generation? The pressure was enormous for this starry romantic comedy about Jessica, a hopeful New Yorker who lands in London with a broken heart. The star took her biggest role by the horns and was a delight to watch, embodying Austen levels of romantic ideals. But it was all very slick and, ironically, was not enough. Plus, the sheer amount of famous friends involved felt icky.

The Sketch Show Return

Not even good enough to be ‘uneven’.

Given the smart recruitment of gifted emerging comics, expectations were high. But unhappily, most of it didn’t land. A recurring sketch was a one-note joke milked to a dry pulp but repeated in every episode. One star seemed too willing to slip into a familiar ranting mode. The writing room sketches, in contrast, simply inspired the thought that they should probably have remained in there a bit longer.

The Knox Dramatisation

This retelling of the story of Amanda Knox was executive produced by Amanda Knox and pretty much exclusively presented the viewpoint of Amanda Knox. So, while there probably is an compelling drama to be made about the horrific 2007 murder, this isn’t it. The subject matter needed to be handled sensitively. Instead, the series struggled painfully to find the right voice, lurching from strangely breezy, slightly stylised farce to inevitably, real-life horror. Complex? Perhaps. A complete mess? Absolutely.

Prime Target

We admire the lead actor … but did we believe him playing the greatest maths genius since, a man so smart he’s on the brink of a breakthrough that could destabilise society? No! This international thriller about secret services spying on – and killing off – intellectuals honestly got more farcical by the second. Formulaic nonsense.

1000 Men and Me: The Bonnie Blue Story

This uncritical portrait followed the content creator notorious for explicit exploits as she undertook her biggest challenge yet. What on earth would possess her? What we wanted was far greater examination of her actual psychology, plus those of the men in the queue. They could at least have spoken to the legendary mum who appeared to haul her son away from the queue. What we got was horrific shots and absolutely no critical analysis of her infamy whatsoever. And to think, the documentary-maker has a teenage daughter too.